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Social Media and Me

By 5:29:00 PM

If you know me in my personal life, or ever had the pleasure of being apart of one of my errr 3 or 4 Facebooks, and who knows what else along the years, you might question “what the what is up with her?”.

I have extreme social media anxiety, and it messes me with me in ways that others might see as foolish, but the thoughts, once there, cannot stop going around in my head. Rather than a way to connect, I saw many years ago people (in my own circle) straight posting one thing online (ex. we are so in love) but in reality, they were about to be divorced. This combined with a few other reasons, such as obsessive checking,  getting “in trouble” with friends if I didn’t post where I was, and other lifestyle changes beckoned me to step away from FB for good. Slowly all the others took the same turn, and the last time I posted on my personal Insta (now deleted) was the afternoon before I met my now-husband (12/2017).

Even now admittedly, I struggle with even the company Gram, because of expectations vs. reality, and a pressure that no one puts on me, but is there within my thoughts. Thus, going forward even that will be treated differently, though not going away entirely.

I have known so many great people through-out my life, and some people I fell out of touch with because of my lack of social media, but I hope for everyone (I have ever known) the very best. Mental health is something I have struggled with all of my life (though have kept that fact hidden from many), and I came to understand/realize that no one can fix it for you (aside from God), but regardless you have to be proactive about it on your own (avoiding triggers).

Simply put and reconfirmed over the past weeks, I am happier and have a better mental balance when my social media is limited to posting devotionals and pinning on Pinterest. Does that make me a weirdo? Perhaps in some peoples eyes, but I’m an imperfect, saved by the grace of God, Jesus Freak who has been called weird since I was a tot, and the only opinion that carries any weight in the grand scheme of things is what God/Jesus/Holy Spirit thinks of me (or any of us).

You will never hear me say that I am an open book, but if you have any questions or comments about this post, please let me know. I will answer as appropriate, and above all hope this provides peace, comfort, and clarification to anyone who may read it.

Peace and blessings to you through Jesus Christ. 💙

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